But though I think the relationship between marriage and social utility is more complicated than I fully understand, I do get a nagging sense of doubt about the idea that all the utility is caused by the sex and the romantic love that a couple shares.
Um, I you ask just about anybody before the 20th century about the social utility of marriage, they'd answer that to provide an environment for raising children. The sex is relevant because that's how children are produced. As for love, in many places the question of whether it was good to love your spouse was a hotly debated controversy.
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